Practicing mindfulness is not a quick fix, nor is it always fun or enjoyable. Yet the long-term effects make it absolutely worthwhile. This is also how Margaux Geeroms (33 years old) experienced it. We asked her a few questions about her experiences. You can read her inspiring story below.
Why did you choose to start with a basic mindfulness-based stress reduction training? What was it that appealed to you?
Margaux: “I noticed that I often couldn’t enjoy beautiful things, that they couldn’t move or touch me. For example, I often couldn’t fully enjoy beautiful views while traveling. In addition, I could also get very bothered by negative thoughts. I often couldn’t let them go. I also regularly caught myself judging people that I didn’t know.”
So the urge to enjoy life more and to be less in her head played a big role for Margaux. In addition, she felt there was a huge difference between how she actually looked at life and how she experienced it. “It didn’t match with how I actually look at life. For example, I think it’s important to stay strong, but also to be able to be present with what is, in the moment, and not be distracted by things you can’t change,” she explains.
You sometimes struggled with the fact that you couldn’t disconnect from your thoughts. What exactly happened in those moments?
Margaux: “During the training, and to this day, I am sometimes confronted with a situation for which I have no solution: that thoughts keep running through my head. The fact that I can’t do anything about this is very difficult for me. It is sometimes frustrating because I try very hard to turn off my thoughts, but then that doesn’t work.”
During the trainings, Margaux learned how to deal with her feelings of frustration by applying mindfulness techniques. “It is important to remain mild to yourself in such moments and to let emotions be instead of immediately wanting to push them away. That’s again an exercise: learning to be okay with the fact that you can’t always feel good, that you can’t fix everything, and that you can and are allowed to be sad once in a while. It’s about making the switch from wanting change to simply noticing and letting be what is,” she explains.
What do you think is an important added value of this type of training for people your age (early thirty-somethings)?
Margaux: “I realized there were certain patterns that were holding me back. Mindfulness is really the key to addressing that. I used to try to fix this issue, but I didn’t succeed. But I also wasn’t trying to do it in a very good way. For example, I tried to simply sit down with my eyes closed for 10 minutes and think about nothing.”
Since taking the MBSR training, Margaux has experienced many positive changes. “I notice that mindfulness and meditation have a positive effect. They are tools you can use at any time and they are even free. You only need yourself. Today, I see more beauty and can enjoy small things more. I feel more gratitude in general. Gratitude is very powerful and rewarding to feel. Being aware of the present reality helps to make things less heavy,” she says.
Margaux also wants to stress the importance of getting support from experienced people. “You can learn a lot from experienced people. I still have a lot of work ahead of me. I would like to let go of certain things, for example, as well as enjoy life even more. Life, and every moment that is part of it, is a wonderful gift and I want to experience it to the fullest,” she says enthusiastically.
How have you built a mindful, meaningful life for yourself?
The small mindfulness exercises Margaux does daily vary from day to day. Examples:
- Right after getting up, she goes outside for a moment, quietly breathes in and out for 5 minutes, with her eyes closed. Then she lists a few things that she is grateful for, often in the mirror. She also does this gratitude exercise in the evening.
- Consciously taking a moment to reflect on what she is doing, what she calls ‘sitting with the universe’. She then literally expresses what is on her mind at that moment. By sitting in silence, answers come automatically.
- Child pose on a yoga mat
- Focusing completely on an action or activity. Think of cycling, cooking, brushing her teeth …
- Meditating. “Sometimes when I meditate, certain places in my body become heavy or painful, for example my forehead or my lower back. Suddenly I feel a heaviness and discomfort there, but at the same time it makes me feel good to feel this way. Moments of mindfulness during the day feel like little rebirths,” she explains.
And how exactly does she make her life meaningful, in a mindful way? Margaux: “I ask myself the question: how does it feel to try to fully engage in a particular experience? I try to stay close to myself and be aware of my energy, even in interactions with people. I try not to judge other people, but let them be in their own value. I also try to have a positive impact on the people around me with what I do in life, and try to make a positive contribution.”
Margaux also lives consciously in her food habits. She has even founded a catering company that delivers vegetarian dishes only. The name is What The Food. In addition, music plays a big role in her life. She also occasionally does DJ work. For example, she played at The Belgian Pride. Check out this video on YouTube.
Did and do you still find it difficult to continue practicing mindfulness?
Margaux: “I find that, in general, I often feel resistance towards things that I know are good for me. That’s a bit of self-sabotage. But I’m not a quitter, and when I decide to do something, I go for it. I was convinced that there are long-term positive effects. So despite the resistance I sometimes felt (and still occasionally feel), I continued.”
Meanwhile, Margaux has cultivated certain new habits, and there too she finds that persistence is very important. “I have been going to the gym three times a week for the past 1.5 months. Until last week, I did this with great reluctance. But now I already notice great effects in my body and endurance. The exercises “flow” more. It gives motivation, makes you happy and proud of yourself,” she shares.
To that she wanted to add this quote:
Good habits are hard to create, but easy to keep.
Bad habits are easy to create, but hard to break.
What Margaux does notice is that she has a harder time keeping up the mindfulness exercises when she is feeling a little down. “I notice that when life feels really tough and I feel like I’m in a hopeless situation, it’s hard for me to persevere. It’s like I forget and am not convinced of the effects. That’s a difficult one and I find that a shame too. But of course it is also a process and a constant exercise in mildness,” she says.
Do you have experience with mindfulness and would you be interested in sharing them with us? Feel free to send a message to marisa.mindfulleven@gmail.com.
